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I’ve loved..

Deeply loved some men

Even those who were not mine

I loved then and still in love now

Even after I knew some were taken

I have felt guilt, embarrassment, disgust and hopelessness

I have been admonished, rejected, insulted, and hated

A broken heart whispers..asking me to stop

To stop the pain, panic, restlessness, and anxiety

I feel sad, miserable, and weak

I want to be stronger than this

To not fall for anyone again

To trust myself and to find happiness in myself

I pray that the day comes when I rejoice and enjoy my own company

I don’t want to look at anyone,

I want to eat, drink, and walk in quiet and happiness with me

I don’t want hope for a false sense of happiness

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